Well. A survey might as well be a blogpost.

Would you do meth if it was legalized?
No, I wouldn't do meth. I would, however, wonder why the hell meth of all drugs was legalized. That just doesn't make sense to me.

Abortion: for or against?
Well. Eurgh. I'm one of those extreme cases people. I just don't believe that someone should be able to kill their own child. I don't care if the child doesn't know the difference because it isn't born yet, it doesn't mean that it isn't a child. I was once at the stage where my mother could have gotten an abortion (not that my mom was considering it). I'm obviously here. I'm not saying you have to keep your child and raise them, but you shouldn't kill it. Be more careful, honestly. Use birth control correctly and it's practically impossible to have a baby. If you use a condom on top of that then OMG! YOU WON'T GET PREGNANT UNLESS YOU HAVE THE WORST LUCK IN THE WORLD!

Would our country fall with a woman president?
Do I think that our country would fall? Not exactly. I don't think that it would fall, but I don't think it'd be the same country that we know today. I don't really think we should have a female president, I just don't.

Do you believe in the death penalty? Make my Day law?
For the first one, I do. I mean, a lot of people say it's inhumane and what if the conviction was wrong in the first place. Well, is a life in prison really all that much better than death itself? Do we really want to endanger society? Not to mention, with the death penalty don't you think that people about to commit a homicide will think twice out of fear of dying themselves? For the make my day law, I think it's kind of risky. The defenition of what is and what is not violent force is difficult, and proving what is and what is not violent force is probably difficult also. It's just risky, I'm not really sure.

Do you wish marijuana would be legalized already?
Yes! Honestly. I mean, I have several reasons for this. First of all, making it illegal isn't stopping those who want to smoke it from smoking it, obviously. People shouldn't go to jail because of it, keep the cells free for real criminals. Second of all, how many deaths have resulted from marijuana? Really, it's not dangerous to anyone else. It's not dangerous at all, except for the fact that people can lace it. But oh, wouldn't legalizing it help that too? It'd be cleaner, better, easier. It's help the economy too. Prices would probably go up, and it'd be like ciggarettes. Think about how much money they bring in. You could tax marijuana and boost the economy. Now, give me those reasons you said it shouldn't be legalized that I haven't already disproved again? Because it's stupid? ... Really, that isn't a reason to keep something illegal. We do a lot of stupid things, but they aren't illegal. Outlaw stupidity and then get back to me.

Are you for or against premarital sex?
I think that two people should be able to do what they want to. If you regret it than it was your fault for having sex too soon, but if you don't regret it, than why should you have had to wait? It really should be between the two people having sex. If it's not right for you, then fine. If it is right for you, then go for it.

Do you believe in God?
Well, not exactly. I don't believe in the Christian God, persay.

Do you think same sex marriage should be legalized?
Yes. Even if you don't like homosexuals, it doesn't mean that just because people can't get married they aren't going to be together, and it really doesn't mean that they are going to go, "screw it, I'm straight. I'm going to go have kids." If two people want to be married, than they should be allowed to. I'd hate to be told I'm not allowed to marry someone who I love.

Do you think its wrong that so many Hispanics are moving to the USA?
Well, I know that we need a certain amount to have our country thrive, but it's getting ridiculous, especially since they don't learn our customs. Look, I'm not going to go into your country and expect you to hire me even though I don't speak English, and I'm really not expecting the entire country to learn it. If you are going to come to this country, do so legally and learn fucking English. Honestly.

12 year old girl has a baby..should she keep it?
I don't think she should get an abortion. If her mom will keep it as her own, than that is fine. She could put it up for adoption or figure something else. I don't think a 12 year old of this day and age could take care of a baby, but that still doesn't mean that she shouldn't have to go through with it. Now if she was raped, then that isn't her fault, she shouldn't have to go through the pain and have her life ruined more than it already was. Then she can get rid of it.

Should the alcohol age be lowered to 18?
It really might as well be. People who want alcohol are going to get it when they want it. Besides, if you are called an adult when you are 18, why shouldn't you be able to drink legally? Also, you're probably heading off to college. What do you REALLY think happens there? Honestly people.

Should the war in Iraq be called off?
I don't make decisions about things that I'm not well informed enough about. This is one of those things.

Assisted suicide is illegal..do you agree?
No. Think about people on their death beds in severe pain, or people who are going to be in severe pain. Should they really have to live through that when they have death coming after all that pain? If it isn't worth it to them, then they shouldn't have to go through it. Besides, do they really want all their loved ones remembering them in that state and having to take care of them and remove themselves from their own lives? I think a lot of people you ask wouldn't. Besides, healthy people who aren't in severe physical pain with life threatening illnesses can kill themselves, why shouldn't an unhealthy person in a horrible state be able to die peacefully?

Do you believe in spanking your children?
Yes! I hate this new brand of pansy parents. I was spanked as a child and it WAS NO CHILD ABUSE. Really! It just teaches your child a lesson that they are far less likely to forget. It teaches them what is right and wrong. People who don't spank their children just raise a bunch of uncontrollable brats that other parents and people would happily give a good whack.

Would you burn an American flag for a million dollars?
Yes, I would. It's not that I don't love this country, but the flag has no special meaning for me. I would burn it for a million dollars.

A mother is declared innocent after murdering her 5 children ina temporary insanity case..what do you think?
I really need all the details and results of the case to say anything about it, though I think I'd be horrified at the person either way.

It's between you and a person who is being kept alive by life supportmachines..one has to die? Who?
First of all, why would one of us have to die? That's a little strange. However, if I wasn't on life support machines and could live on my own, than myself, of course. If I was though, and the other person was more likely to live longer, than them. Whoever is more likely to live.

Are you afraid others will judge you from reading some of your answers?
No, I hope that people do. I rather have someone judge me by my opinions than by something else that is really meaningless. However, instead of judging me, I wish that people would accept it. I wouldn't mind responses with peoples own opinions. I don't mind debate.

I think I want to be Ms. Kaiser

I suppose I should explain this. I want to be like Ms. Kaiser in the way that she's bohemian and listens to indie music that a lot of people haven't heard of and seems so cool and I bet you that she knows of little cafes that she goes to.
I want to be that person.
I want to be the person who sits in the tiny cafes and writes, surviving only on coffee, tea and bagels. I want to know about music that no one has heard of and have a bohemian style. I want to know about the small places that most people over look. I want to be intelligent as opposed to ignorant in more than just the book smart type of way.
That's what I consider awesome.
I want to be my awesome.

This is really all I want to say.

Natalie, I don't know if you are reading this, and you may think that I'm a bit of a creep, but I felt like starting off with this: Ever since I wrote the 10 things about myself for you I've felt more connected to you. I can't quite explain it, but I really wish I knew you better, or hung out with you. I guess really I just sort of wish we were friends, since we are way more of aqquantances than anything. That's how I feel at least.

On a completely different note...
I hate friend problems.

My Ten Things.

1.) I never quite say what I mean, and I rarely ask for things directly. I tend to say something that I don't mean and expect you to figure out the hidden meaning. I don't like to ask for things a lot of the time, and I hate asking for help, even if it's just asking where I am supposed to sit. I don't like feeling dumb or inferior, and I don't like feeling selfish or mean, or any other bad adjective for saying what I mean.

2.) I force myself to grow resentment. I'm always doing things that I know will cause me to resent those who are close to me. It's my way of keeping people at arms length. I may have you seem, and even be, very close, but I'm always pushing you slightly away.

3.) I abosolutely want to punch people who purposely mispronounce my name. I get it, it looks nothing like how it's pronounced. Adding 50 -er's to the end just makes me want to hit you in the face.

4.) I use my sexuality to be close to people. No, I don't sleep around, but I like to be sexualish with people. Hence why I hug people so much, and why I'll look guys who aren't my boyfriend in the eye when I'm 5 inches from their face. It's not that I "like" them, it's that sexuality is the natural way of feeling close to someone.

5.) I like leaving an impression. As you may or may not have noticed from a lot of my blog posts, I like to leave an impression. I really like to get people thinking. Philosophy should be spread, in my opinion, so my main goal a lot of the time is simply to get you thinking. This normally happens late at night. Rainstorms and certain types of music help.

6.) I have a voice inside my head. I'm not going to go ahead and say I'm schizophrenic, because I realize what's going on. However, ever since I was little, there has been another person inside my head. I named her Sarah. She's a total bitch and is always against what I want, and is highly protective of me. We make bets. If I win, she has to go away for a while. If she wins, I have to hold my breath for a while, which let's her breath, and gain strength. It sounds crazy because it is.

7.) I've never felt quite like I fit. I don't know how many people really have this problem to this extreme, but my entire life, even when I was 5, I remember ALWAYS feeling left out. I have never quite fit. I can be the center of attention but still want to be off alone in my room because I know in my heart that I don't belong there. I can name maybe one point in my life where I felt like I fit, but I don't feel like sharing it.

8.) I get hung up on things. I don't have a weak memory, even if I pretend to forget a lot of things. I often times remember better than you do, though I'll act like I've forgotten completely. However, this is not my point. I get hung up on everything. The little things, the big things, and the inbetween. I remember when I was 12 and was walking around a sand dune with this kid I dated for a while Sam, and I accidentally said Math instead of Science and I am still kicking myself about it. You can't tell me not to worry about something or not think about it. I may outwardly forgive and forget, but I always have it on the back of my mind. It adds to my anxiety.

9.) I like indie music and indie things. I love random indie music. I like random indie clothes. I think Stephanie Cyburt dresses amazingly because it's all so unique. I love the music that's on the OC because it's all indie music or indie bands doing covers. If you are in my family room you'll see tons of sticky notes with lyrics written down so I can find the songs later, such as from commercials and television shows. I don't know as many indie things as I would like to, but when I find something I treat it like treasure. If you have any reccomendations for books, music, or anything, you really should tell me. I'd appreciate it more than you would know. Even if you just find an article you think might interest me. Even if it has nothing to do with indie and just something about the world. I like to spread my knowledge, and I like to know things other people don't. I like to listen to things not everyone does. I like to find something that really fits into who I am.

10.) I'll like you more if you'll have an indepth conversation with me. I like having friendly chats with people, yes, but what really gets to me is getting into really indepth discussions. Philosophy, speaking in riddles, talking about what really matters. What we think about life, the future, death, religion, music, nature, the past, the now, the way things work, you name it. I feel far more connected having one deep discussion with someone than having a lot of regular talks with people.

There's what I have.

CLTCMF!

I wanted to talk about a few points which I've thought about as of late, or that something brought to my attention. These would be crying, love, trust, confusion, music, and family. You can assume as you will how these were brought to my attention, but please don't jump to the obvious conclusion; it's not right.

First off; crying. I just stopped watching the music video to "When You Were Young," by the Killers, which wasn't what brought crying to my attention, but it's what compelled me to post. Crying is an incredibly difficult thing to do. It's easy to start, hard to finish, and painful to take part of. I don't understand people who don't cry. How can you not cry? How does that work as a person? How does that work while having human emotions and feelings. It isn't something that makes you weak. It's something that shows that you are living. You can't live a life free from pain. I don't believe that's possible, and that isn't being cynical, that is being honest. There is no life without pain, there is emptiness. There for, there is no life without crying. I think that's why crying is so painful; life needs the pain. Maybe that's why people cry so much.

Love. Such a simple word, but I don't need to tell you how confusing, busy, talked about, meaningul, meaningless, over used, under used, forgotten, and remembered this word is. It's everything wrapped up into one that is so easy to give out, so easy to recieve, and yet so hard to prove. How can you really prove your love to someone? Why is it that it is so difficult to think about someone not believing that you love them? Why is it so hard to believe that someone loves you? What circumstances does there have to be to allow love to happen? Do you really have to be able to love yourself before you can love someone else? There are so many different forms of love though. How can you really figure out what someone means when they say they love you. To what extent? Do they want to be yours forever, or do they just want to be your friend forever? Which is it? I wish that I knew. I wish I knew the answers of how everone truly felt. I wish I knew how I truly felt about half the people I know, and I wish I could prove to the few people I know for a fact that I love that I love them. I wish.

I don't think that you have to be totally honest to be trustworthy. However, that doesn't stop me from wishing I knew the truth behind peoples words. I hate that you can't trust the things coming out of peoples mouths. I hate that you can't know what parts of what people say you can trust, and what parts you can only trust to be false. That is why I wish I could read peoples minds. You don't have to trust someone if you know what they are thinking. Especially if they don't know that you know what they are thinking. So, I wish I knew just what was going on in the heads of the people I trust, especially when I know they're lying, which, by the way, doesn't make me trust them less. Trust isn't all about knowing the honesty in every situation, it's knowing that people will have your back and give you the truth when the situation really calls for it.

Confusion really goes with the whole trust thing, and the whole someone you trust lying thing. When you get a suspiscion someone you trust is lying, the only result is confusion. What is it that is really going on. Confusion happens to everyone, so I'm sure that everyone knows what I'm talking about. It just sparks your curiosity, confusion, doesn't it? If you are confused because you don't know what is true, then all you have left is plain curiosity of what is true. So, really, confusion just makes you want to know more. And well all know about curiosity.

Music is something that I think I can cover pretty quickly. Music is taking over everyones lives, as it always had. It affects us all so much. We express ourselves through it, feel is, let it run through our veins. Yes, run, not flow. We feel it pounding in our ears whether we listen to it loudly or quietly. It's just this magnificent thing that no one would easily give up. The best thing to alter a mood, and most affective.

I believe that family was the last thing on my list. Spending the day with a family other than your own makes you realize the importance of family. I've been thinking of my family in the past, my family in the present, and the family that I will have of my own in the future. It's interesting to think about. You don't really realize how it will be like to have a family of your own when you are my age. Fifteen is not the time to think about starting a family of your own. It is, however, interesting to think about what that family will eventually be like. Also, how important family really is. How you need that closeness to keep you going at times. How they are always there even when you forget about them. How even when you don't like them, you still can feel close to them at times. It's just an interesting and peculiar thing, family is.

That, basically, is what is on my mind right now. I believe it is now time to research Neptune. So I shall have at it.

You Put the Art in Retarted

The Bravery makes me smile so much. It's pretty cool that they are becoming popular now, because I can hear them on XM radio. I need their newer CD, speaking of which.

Anyways, today was totally great. It didn't start off well, I went to the dentist, actually fell asleep while they drilled my mouth, fell asleep in the waiting room as Dad got his crown done. You know, typical. ; D Then I got Mom her present for tommorow, which I have to wrap soon. Went out to breakfast with Mom and Dad, found out Jake wasn't "in the mood to hang out" which, obviously, dissapointed me. Except, then, guess what? YOU GUESSED WRONG! Cinder Block, John Stevenson and I went to the movies and it was super amazing. They make me smile really, really huge. I guess I'll just see Jake whenever. It'll be cool...on that day that will eventually come.

By the way, Julius Caesar is going to be epic. The trailer is on youtube in navi's channel (xXnavoXx). Watch it. Seriously man.

It makes me want to shoot myself in the head a little

Sometimes I hate seeing the other side of people. Everyone has more than one side; they act different around different people. It's not as if it's some shocking revalation. It doesn't stop me from hating it though. I hate when someone who you think is a little different from the people they hang out with turns into an ass just like the rest of them when they get bored. It really pisses me off.

Sometimes I just lose a little faith in humanity.