Someone is a douche!

I just read my last post, and I started to think about what I was thinking when I wrote that, and I am a complete douche sometimes. I'm sure that most of you were aware of that, I mean, everyone is a douche sometimes. So in summary of these last couple sentences, no two people are not complete douches (I hope you got that reference).
So, now that I am in a bit of a better mood then I was during my last post (I think watching Spaceballs totally helps with that), let me make a real, satisfying post.
So what is it about New Years that makes people think about life? It's the end of a calendar year, and maybe it's just because of what JJ said in A Long Way Down (which I'm thinking maybe I should read tonight?), but what is all that significant about the end of a calendar year? Now I'm saying this rather hypocritically because I too have been thinking today. I have this mood that I tend to get in at the end of the year. I think that I got Lizzi mad at me because of that mood. I wasn't being exactly supportive of her, which is pretty stupid because she is there for me almost all of the time. So if she is reading this, then I'm sorry for that. Anyways, getting off that bit of a tangent and back to my hypocriticalness (which I don't think is a word), why is it that people reflect so much? How much do they think of the future? They decide what it is that they want to change, but as far as I have seen, that is it. Do they ever think about what they want to keep the same? Speaking of resolutions, what are mine? Are they even resolutions or just things that I want to think about through the year? I suppose what I am asking is what are my visions of 2008? How exactly do I go about answering that question? I suppose I'll just have to start at the beginning.
My Visions- Next year is going to be a lot like other years. I will talk about changing the things that I have always wanted to change, but most likely I won't actually change anything. Or then again, is that how it's going to happen? Maybe this will be the year that I change all the things that I've wanted to change. I don't know if I'll be able to do it myself. I need reminders. I get lazy. Maybe I just need ideas of how to keep my positive changes going.
What are the things that I want to change? I want to overall calm myself. I want to stop taking little things and making big deals out of them. I walk to stop freaking out and causing other people (as in, Jake) to freak in return. I want to stop being lazy and maybe actually do something once in a while. If I want to stay in any sort of shape I might as well work for it. Speaking of working for it, I want to work for my grades too. Instead of skiving off and not doing my work I want to actually get home, do the dishes, and then do my homework. I won't have the stress, and one less stress in my life makes things better. This may sound weird, though it would make sense to one person, but it will give me more room for other stresses, in specific, another persons stresses. He may hate that I even think that, but still.
So what exactly are my visions for next year? My visions that life is going to continue, some changes may happen, actually, changes will happen for sure. I change every year, and I'm sure I will continue to change. I see me staying with Jake, especially is I do calm myself like I said I want to. I see my grades staying decent even if they aren't the A's that I would like. I can't actually see anything, because I can't see the future. So really, I just wonder what will happen.
So now I am watching Rain Man. I'm not going to watch the ball drop. I do love Tom Cruise as an actor though, just so you know. So does my brother. We had a little conversation about it. Dustin Hoffman is pretty cool too. I like him a lot better when he was younger than the stuff that he's in now.
So in the spirit of experiencing the movie, I'll post later. Maybe I'll even tell you about my experience of time pushing me into a new year.

It's a tie.

Right now, it's a tie. A few people may remember my old blog. The amount of posts which it reached before I dumped it was 18 which also happens to be how many I have right now. Hopefully this one will make it into the new year, and some how, I think it'll make it past 18 as I'm planning to have another post tonight.
So where should I start with this one? How about today?
So far I have played Guitar Hero 3, Aunt Lori and A.J. left, and I watched Akira (the movie, and for those of you who aren't so anime inclined, have you seen the music video for Stronger. You know that part where he's in that machine with the things going around him? It's from this). It was pretty friggen awesome. The guy who does Kaneda's voice reminds me of Ichigo's, and the whole thing reminded me of Paranoia Agent in a strange way, but both of those things came after Akira, so, yeah. Anyways, it was pretty cool, but I missed two calls from Jake. I won't be seeing him today. Doesn't that suck? I mean, he's had plans for a while for New Years night so I don't mind about that, but, just, I wish we were fucking older so we wouldn't have to rely on other people to hang out.
Anyways.
I'm trying to think of a New Year's resolution.
I don't know.
I'll write later today or tommorow.
Yeah.
Bye.

And so another year passed by...

And now I'm 15. It was a pretty good birthday, I woke up by Jake calling me at the time I was born, 9:09. Then Steve attacked me with pillows. xD
Hana also called early in the morning, but I was in the shower so I called her back. It was very nice to know that people were thinking about me (not to mention the billion facebook and myspace comments!)
Anyways, so why was my birthday so nice? As side from presents and all that, Jake came over today, which was the first time that I had ever seen a friend of mine on my birthday, and it was even better that it was Jake. I must say that my favorite present of the day was simply SEEING him, I like that even better than the beautiful earrings he got me and my new camera. I'm so glad that I met him. Honestly.
So tommorow...that would be Christmas, as I'm sure most of you know by looking at the date of this post. What will happen on Christmas? I have to admit that I'm not sure it'll be a whole lot. I don't know how well I'll be able to concentrate. How much do you all bet that I'll end up reading or on the computer, or probably both at some point. Not that I mind, I mean, geez, I have to say that I love reading.
Now, completely changing the subject, I had a discussion about beliefs the other day (yay, getting back to how my posts USUALLY are). It made me realize that I still basically believe what I had decided in seventh grade. I hadn't really thought about my beliefs much lately, but I just started talking, and everything I was saying I was confident about...and it was all from seventh grade. I don't know how many people know what I set my beliefs as in seventh grade, but they are pretty interesting when I can fully explain them. It's all about what you could call your spirit. It's sort of like your inner god. We each have a personal god. There is a sort of reincarnation, but not of the normal sort. Your destiny is set by yourself when you are born. All the souls are seperate but they communicate like people, but seperate from ourselves. Two souls can be communicating while the people are across the world from each other. It's what causes our destinies to work out with other peoples destinies. They don't CONTROL us, because we set them ourselves. I don't know how much sense any of this makes, but I think it's an interesting idea at the very least.
Anyways, Merry Christmas, good-bye.

By the way, that's creepy as hell.

I am not sure if you know this or not, but it's really hard to do what you are supposed to when someone tells you to do otherwise and then give you an amazing kiss. I did not, however, succumb to the amazingness, and I went to Matt Berger's party. Or maybe it was Tam's party. I'm not really sure, but I went. It was pretty fun, mostly I played Halo 3 and Guitar Hero 3. I can finally actually move and shoot and kill in Halo 3...if I play on easy. xD Still, I must say it's an improvement to what I could do before, which was just about nothing. I am very excited.
I finally got Jake's present today. It took a little while to pick out, but I think that he'll like it a lot if it fits correctly. I showed it to a couple people and they said it was very "Jake-esque". I hope that he agrees with that. I'm just not sure when I'm going to be able to get it to him, maybe tommorow? Hopefully not Teri's party, but I can't wait for that either.
So, unfortunately, I still do not have my words back. It would be incredibly nice if I did, but maybe I'll just have to wait? Maybe I'll just have to keep trying to write. Just...when something comes to mind write it. Keep writing these lists that I've been writing, and slowly make my way back into being able to write something that is worth anything to anyone? We'll see what happens.
As another quick note, I am incredibly glad that break is here. I am nervous about meeting my aunt, but I still have about a week, well that's a like, less then a week, but it's not even my birthday yet. Sorry that this is a horribly short post, or at least for me, but I'm out for now, my family keeps trying to read over my shoulder. Which by the way, is creepy as hell.

Guess who hasn't wrote in 20 days?

KATIE! That's who! Well luckily that should mean that I have a lot to update, so we'll see how it goes, 'eh?

First off, as some of you may no today (well, yesterday) was me and Jake's 2 month. It's such a weird amount of time, you can't really make a big deal about it, but it's still nice to know that we've been together for a while, but it feels like it should have been longer. This next month will probably go faster, but who knows.
For the quick overview, he came over, we talked for a bit, we went to Panera with my parents, went back home, made-out, blah, blah, blah. You probably could have guessed all that without me even telling you. Stefan and Laurie picked him up which was entertaining. I think that if I talked to them more I would really like Laurie, and obviously I'd probably like Stefan, but just saying. Anyways, if you want to know more about all this just ask me, and I'll talk with what I feel comfortable with, I guess.
Break is coming up, which I am so completely ready for. I'm going home with Matt Berger on Wednesday, and so is Tam. That's Jake's bus so it's cool, but we are going to help set up for the party and then we are going to you know, have a party. xD Then later when break has actually started there is another amazing party I am looking forward too, and then, my birthday.
I can not honestly say that I am excited for my birthday. Normally I anticipate it, count it down at least a little bit, think about it, same with Christmas. Now my birthday is less then 10 days away and I still have hardly thought about it. I'm not uber excited for getting presents, in fact, I could hardly think of presents to put on the list. I'm not doing anything for my birthday, I'm really not all that excited. 15 seems to be looming over my head too. It doesn't sound right in my head, 15? Hmm...I don't know if I want to be 15 yet. Can we just hold that off for a few months? I kind of like being 14. Not like it'll make a big difference but still. Is this what highschool does to you? I haven't seemed to look forward to any of the things I usually do, and I don't notice the things I used to. I know it's not just me because other people have brought it up. It's just...strange. But speaking of Christmas, guess who still hasn't gotten Jake, Andrea or Teri something yet? You guessed it, ME! I am so screwed. I need to find Jake a present, but I am finding it increasingly difficult and I want to find something perfect, but at this point, I just want to find something that I think he'll like, but I can't seem to do it. I want to get him a great present but I am so incapable of it. I wish I knew EXACTLY what he wanted and EXACTLY where to get it, I mean, just like somehow knew it. And apparantly he's getting me something sweet because whenever people learn what it is they go, "Aww," and look at me with that, you-are-so-lucky-to-have-someone-like-that look. So how am I going to look when I can't fucking find anything!?!? GAHHH! Maybe I should have listened when he said he didn't want anything, but I know that I'd feel bad not getting him anything. Bleh.
Anyways, break. Yeah. Again. Looking forward to it. Steve is home until January 7th, because he has a long ass break, which I am totally jealous of. It's pretty awesome. It should be interesting to have him around again. Also interesting to have around will my my Aunt Lori and cousin A.J. whom I have never met before (either of them). I'm actually really nervous about meeting them. It's like, I should have known these people all my life, but I don't, so now they are going to meet me when I've already basically grown up, and what are they going to think of me? Are they going to like me? Are we supposed to love each other, I mean, we are related after all? She's gonna be here from the 26th to the 31st, so it's not like it's an insanely long time or anything, I'm just a little bit terrified. The only person who's listened to me when I say this though is Lizzi, if I mention it to other people (even Jake) they are just like, mmhm, yeah. It's so lame, I kind of want to talk about this. I mean, it's just so strange that I'm just meeting my aunt and I know virtually nothing about her, and then when I meet her she's going to be staying at my house and see...ME. I guess Steve isn't too excited about her coming up here. I wonder if Erica is going to come down here at all this break, or if they'll just see each other back up at school (Erica is Steve's girlfriend).
Anyways, I ought to be going. Good night people. ;D